Flying cheap ??

Holiday time again (at least for the school kids). You may be flying a LCC out of your city for that once-in-a-lifetime vacation.

Here is a low down on what you can expect.

1. Arrive at the airport at your own sweet time. After all the security checks for your luggage and you are ready to board, the PYT announcer will say; "Sorry for the inconvenience, but our flight's pilot has been poached by another LCC, if any of the passengers have a pilot license they are asked to report at the nearest counter for pre-flight tests. XYZ airways wishes you a pleasant fl(r)ight."

2. Have as much luggage as you possibly can. The LCCs don't mind. When a Sleeper class ticket gives you full freedom to move your household goods by train, why should a costlier LCC ticket deny you freedom to move the Mohalla??

3. Have plenty of water. The LCCs don't offer complementary water bottles. They do sell them. But then for their price you can get a IMFL bottle itself don't you?

4. Beware of snakes - Heard recently that in-flight entertainment in LCC is done by snake charmers who play a dual role. They entertain you in-flight and also make you hold to your seats. You see all the seat belts are done away with in the flights. (cost cutting).

5. Prepare to walk - sometimes LCCs don't get sufficient access to the airstrip (high airport usage taxes you see). Generally favoured area for landings are the meadows near airports or the Hyderabad highway if you are landing in Bangalore (earlier it was the KGA near the old airport in Domlur).

6. See lots of horror movies - The LCCs don't give make up kits for their air-h(gh)ostesses.

7. Get yourself a good parachute - The parachutes provided in the LCCs came from Somalia as that was a good cost benefit for the manufacturers. Heard that most Somalians are too keen to see people die.

8. Watch fear factor - Advisable that you watch all the seasons. Some passengers have been asked to help out in reviving the turboprop engine since the rotor blades don't move mid-air! Experience in reviving a fan in sleeper class bogies might not be useful here as the comb you carry is no match for the large rotor blades.

7. Lastly don't tease the air-hostesses - Someone has to do the job don't they??

Happy holidaze !!

PS - I have no opinion on which one is the best LCC. But then I don't fly very often you see.(Especially after being red-carded due to recession)